All you peons and know nothings out there, beware, life is dangerous. The government has spoken. That is, some bureaucratic groups peopled by bureaucrat researchers have determined that living is dangerous to your health spending your tax dollars to tell you that living is dangerous. Now pay attention, the government has spoken.

The latest rage is transfat, that artery clogging stuff that food companies use to preserve food and make the shelf life longer. Can you see the conflict now? If you eat the stuff, you may not live very long and if the stuff isn’t used in the food, the food may not live very long. But no matter, the government has spoken and all of us know the government bureaucrats are always correct, so says the government.

Automobile manufacturers which make SUVs have been in the gun sights (no pun intended) for a long time. SUVs are killers. The government has spoken. Everyone must shun SUVs and buy small cars which aren’t killers. The government has spoken. Oops.  Oops? Why oops you ask?

The latest ratings by the government safety gurus show that more people are injured and killed by the small fuel efficient cars than those who drive big cars and SUVs. And it isn’t because those killer SUVs are running and riding roughshod over the small efficient government approved little cars. It is because the little cars fold like aluminum foil when they hit trees, posts, rocks, and other bigger cars.

Then there was the saccharin scare of a few eons a go. It was dangerous stuff. It caused toe fungus, warts, dandruff, split fingernails, and monetary loss to the sugar companies. Well, maybe not all that stuff, but it was dangerous. The government has spoken.

Don’t eat eggs. The cholesterol in them will clog the arteries and you’ll end up with a short shelf life, no better than Humpty Dumpty who fell off the wall. The government has spoken. Oops again. Talk about egg on your face! It is now known that eggs are beneficial and actually helps control cholesterol. The government probably wished it hadn’t spoken.

The bureaucrats think they must protect us from all the bad decisions we make because business is out there lying to us and causing us to make bad decisions, since we peons don’t have enough sense to know what things are dangerous without all the great advice that comes from government researchers. When the government speaks, we are supposed to listen since the government has spoken.

When was the last time you heard a government researcher praise business for doing something good? Never? Correct. All we hear is the bellowing of Ted Kennedy, Hillary Clinton, Barney Frank, Jerrold Nadler, Nancy Pelosi, and all the others castigating business for their evil doings. Now, does that answer why the researchers never find anything good? Their budgets come from the ilk that bellow, and thus reward them with your tax dollars for their research into the evils of all things we use daily. How long would their funds last if they spoke well of business?

The system as it stands with its anti-business mind set in Congress mandates that researches stoke the politicians or they won’t be employed anymore. In order to justify the budgets they have to speak as the politicians give them utterance. Will they admit to the foregoing? Only when Humpty Dumpty is put together again.

 The whole government funded research business is similar to Don Quixote jousting at windmills thinking they are the enemy. Congress and the researchers never acknowledge that they are wrong and when proven so, they ride off looking for more windmills. In Sorting It Out, be very wary when the government has spoken. They usually have not a clue about which they speak and history proves that so. I have spoken.

12-23-2006 DEC